Dirty 30.

Hi friends! I had a birthday this weekend, and it was spectacular (my dear friend gave a delightful account here). A bunch of people flew in from across this great nation, and we decamped to the mountains to celebrate in true Colorado fashion: we hiked, we canoed, and we hot tubbed.

Dillon Reservoir

Apparently, this is real life.

Hiking near Dillon Reservoir


Several people asked how I felt about being 30. Many said turning 30 had been great, transitioning into a time of greater peace, stability, and confidence.   This birthday carries great significance – just as 21, 18, and 16 did – and while I’m happy and grateful to be here, it causes you to think about where you are and where you’ve been.

Last weekend, at my friends’ wedding (much, much more on that soon), they recited vows they had written. These words were authentic, beautiful, and true, and they spoke about how they promised to take care of each other and themselves.

Regardless of whether or not we’re in relationships, we’re all our own life partners. This body is the only vehicle that moves me around the planet, and I’m the only one who hears all the thoughts in my head and feels all the feelings in my heart.  So…inspired by those two great friends, I wrote some vows to myself (30, in fact), on the occasion of my 30th birthday.

I will…

  • Do yoga.
  • Eat dark chocolate and savor it.
  • Go for a run along the river, even when I’m tired (but sometimes I’ll just sit on my couch and watch The Bachelorette, and I will refuse to feel any guilt).
  • Turn off the TV and listen to Melody Gardot while drinking a glass of wine.
  • Feel the sublime gratitude brought on by a sunset.
  • Sit with sadness when it comes along, trusting that darkness doesn’t eliminate light – I will try to remember that life is a constant cycle of day and night, each beautiful and terrifying and worthwhile in their way.
  • Go to museums.
  • Trust the desires of my soul.
  • Buy a VW Westfalia camper van and drive across the country.
  • Never be too cool for a fanny pack.
  • Listen to my mother, who is full of life and fun.
  • Listen to my brother, who is full of life and fun and surprising wisdom.
  • Listen to my step-family, who had the boundless kindness to adopt us into their fold.
  • Go to sleep at a reasonable hour.
  • Stay up late when it’s worth it.
  • Learn to tell the difference.
  • Go outside often.
  • Take vitamins.
  • Stop reading books I don’t enjoy.
  • Try to recognize the difference between liking a guy and being competitive with myself.
  • Drink local beer.
  • Drink good wine.
  • Drink great champagne.
  • Listen to Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me on Saturday mornings with a mug of hot coffee and a fried egg sandwich.
  • Remember to vacuum.
  • Take pride in my dusty car, because it’s a symbol of weekends in the mountains.
  • Not be afraid to ride my bike, even if everyone else on the trail is wearing spandex and their game face.
  • “Be silly, be honest, be kind.” (– Ralph Waldo Emerson)
  • Read books that are beautiful, even if I’ve read them 15 times before.
  • Remember that this universe has given me all the loveliness I’ve ever imagined, and help others when I can.

One hilarious and awesome friend wrote the following wise words in my birthday card: “Being 30 is just like being 29, except you give fewer shits.” I’m excited to join her on the RIGHT side of our 20s, with all the confidence and curiosity to explore and expand the boundaries of my life.

I’m happy to shed some of the uncertainty and anxiety that weighs me down. I’m going to wear what I want and do things that make me happy, and I’ll focus my energy on other people instead of worrying about things like razor burn in my armpits.

Because, really…who gives a shit?

Trail in Dillon


4 thoughts on “Dirty 30.

  1. Pingback: The Balanced Life. | Rocky Mountain Hi

  2. Pingback: Bachelorette Bash. | Rocky Mountain Hi

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